The Pratt's Guide to Heart Warrior Parenting

The week leading up to closing has been jam-packed. Tuesday, we signed off on our buyer's Due Diligence requests- completing the process of selling our house a day early. Yesterday, Logan and I celebrated 9 years of marriage and had our 2nd to last Fetal ECHO. That doesn't include our day jobs, all the quotes on home repairs we're working through with our agent, or the massively unenjoyable temper tantrums we are blitzed with at all hours of the day and night. Our faerie-like daughter has begun to moonlight as a super villain and she is (unfortunately) quite good at it. The Fetal ECHO went as hoped- no new complications. It's funny what good news looks like when you live in bad news, but we'll take the good news however and whenever it appears. While we are not yet booked for our induction, we have a pretty decent idea of when that will happen, so things are starting to take real shape. We are sustained by the raw excitement of moving into a new place and all the ...

The first question I ask myself when encountering a stranger who wants to be excited about my obvious pregnancy is, "how much do I want to tell this person?" For some readers, the automatic answer is "nothing," but once you're in the situation you find yourself at a crossroads and, for me, how my day is going is a large factor in how I respond. If I'm feeling optimistic and not really interested in delving into details, I simply say what my due date is, our son's gender, and confirm I'm very excited. This interaction is generally positive, but there is a lingering feeling of forced enthusiasm and falsehood- like when someone at church asks how you're doing and you robotically say, "I'm good," even if your world is in shambles. There is a certain level of showmanship when I respond this way. Everyone loves a pregnant lady and the hope and joy pregnancy represents. No one really expects to be bummed out approaching who they assume i...

Today marks week 27, the final week of the 2nd Trimester and the calm before the moving storm. For the normal pregnancy, we'd have 13 more weeks to chug along and plan, but since our first open heart surgery requires more planning than usual, we've lost a week. Sand in the hour glass seems to be spiraling downward at breakneck speed. 12 weeks feels like 12 days right now. Albert Einstein might have more interesting things to say about this perception, but you guys are stuck with me. Tomorrow is filled with house appointments which I will thankfully not be present for, but will still bite my nails with worry over. Is our house structurally sound? Gosh, I sure hope so- we do still live here. Is it worth what the other appraiser said it was? Is it worth more (yes, please) or less (ahhh, no!!!)? Radon? Not last time we checked, but who knows? Tomorrow is basically final exam day. If everything goes well, we're full steam ahead. If not, well, I'm trying not to contemplate ...

Despite this world being extraordinarily challenging for a lot of people, there is a significant amount of ignorance surrounding how to be present with people experiencing tough circumstances. This is less an indictment of individuals and more so a judgment of our culture. Even in the church, there is little instruction on how to mourn. There's a whole book of the bible dedicated to grief and, in my 31 years of life, I have yet to hear a teaching that truly delves into how to lament our own circumstances or how to be present with others that are grieving. This lack of education does us all a great disservice- not just to the person experiencing great pain, but also to those who want to help and don't know how.  If you read Lamentations 1:16, you'll note while Jerusalem is going through a horrible situation, it's not just the situation that is being lamented, but also the lack of friends to comfort her.  "This is why I weep and my eyes overflow with tears. ...

This week, we had 3 prenatal appointments: Urology, Fetal ECHO, and the Surgeon/PCICU introduction. On top of that was listing our home on Wednesday and showings this weekend (a more solid update on that later). So, needless to say, it's been a big one both emotionally and strategically. First up, the urology appointment- as noted in a previous post, our urologist with the apt name, Dr. Weiner, went very well. Dilation, while more than average is not pronounced enough to raise concerns and testing after birth will confirm if any other actions need to be taken, but surgery is unlikely. So, all in all, we count our blessings on that front. The Fetal ECHO on Thursday also went well. Fun fact: 24-25 week ECHOs are particularly helpful because the heart is bigger than earlier scans (so easier to see all sections) and baby's bones are not yet solid, so the picture is uninhibited by shadows. This is the most clear a scan we will likely have, so the news at this appointment is real...

While Valentine's Day has just passed, it might interest you to know the entire month of February is dedicated to Congenital Heart Defect (CHD) Awareness and there are so many kinds of CHD: ASD, AVS, CoA, CVAC, HLHS, HRHS, PDA, VSD ... the list goes on and on. These kids are unique people and their conditions are unique to them, but the common denominator with these all these sweet babies and children is their overarching call sign, "Heart Warrior." I did some digging, but apparently not enough, and I can't seem to get a bead on who coined the term or when. Regardless, our son is a Heart Warrior, thus a nuanced part of our blog title is now explained. For our son, this call sign will be like a second name to him. He will grow up being "[Insert Chosen Boy Name Here], Heart Warrior." He likely won't add it to a resume, but it will be at the core of who he is. I wonder what that will be like for him. Like any born identity, I'm sure it will be norma...

The week has started out anxious and exhausted, but it has not been without some wins. Let me back-track for a sec- Saturday, we went on a house hunting marathon, seeing 8 homes in 4 & 1/2 hours with our awesome real estate agent (if you need one, lemme know and I'll send her your way). It was informative on several different levels: 1) day dates are amazing, even if it's house hunting. Parents of toddlers forget sometimes that they actually like their spouses and a day date can really help clear up that uncertainty. 2) The housing market is HOT in Durham. Seriously. As an example, we were midway through a house tour when our real estate agent got an email stating the house had gone into contingency from a showing earlier that morning and that our showing was cancelled. 3) All it takes is the right house in the right neighborhood to send you on a love-sick bender that can consume your every waking thought. Sunday, we made our offer on the house we want and the anxiety c...